The Hose

Evil
At one point in your life, you've either listened to Love Line or watched the show on MTV, right? You know, Love Line is the show with Dr. Drew and Adam Corolla. I used to listen to the radio show when I lived in the Bay Area, mostly while in my car, driving home from work late at night. Ah, those were the heady days of startup fever. But anyway... I always wondered about the 14 and 15 year old girls who would call in and ask questions about BJ and pregnancy tests and morning-after pills and all that crazy jazz. Who were these girls? And why didn’t they go to MY high school? I always wondered what they looked like and if I could spot them in a crowd. OK, hey, sure... that MAY BE a little perverted but listen, I was driving home from work late at completely crappy hours and living in Silicon Valley where sausages outnumber coochie by like, a million to one... at least. What do you want from me? But back to the topic... so yeah, what did these girls look like?

Now I know!

Has anyone seen American Juniors... particularly the chick contestants? DUDE, those chicks are dirty 14 year olds. I am almost positive that they have better BJ technique than a lot of stuck-up Ivy League girls who you might or might not know.

I've decided to stop watching American Juniors, not because I suddenly turned gay, but because in my heart, I know that watching the show is a ding on my Heaven Application.

Just for the record: I think Lucy Hale is my favorite.