My Brain Just Turned To Mush

Julia Allison gives digital dating advice on MTV's It's On with Alexa Chung! from Julia Allison on Vimeo.

Crush of the Week: Zooey Deschanel

Every so often, I will notice someone I am totally aware of and suddenly realize she is the most amazing thing ever created.

One such moment happened several years ago, while re-watching the movie "Elf". There was a scene where Zooey Deschanel is in the shower and singing "Baby, It's Cold Outside" - the greatest/sleaziest song ever. Her voice was amazing and she was totally lovely. I was beside myself.

To that point, I was aware of her most as Patrick Fuget's sister in "Almost Famous" and I barely noticed her. To me this was almost a completely different person. Just a few days before this about face, Killer B had suggested we go see a band he was interested in. As a selling point, he told me that Zooey Deschanel was the lead singer and some fellow named M. Ward was also involved. My response was at best tepid. We did not go.

Later, that summer - She & Him: Volume 1 became on of my favorite albums. I found myself playing "Change is Hard" for anyone who would listen. I realized I was completely obsessed with Zooey Deschanel.

She's amazing. She's in a new movie. I can't wait. It's called 500 Days of Summer.

As a bonus, she and M reunited to contribute an sort of awesome cover to "Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want". It's available here.

My pick

I'm bossy like that, so here's my pick for xTian's Crush of the Week for the rest of June: Alexa Chung, new host of It's On! With Alexa Chung! on MTV! So emphatic! Gentlemen, she's also half-Chinese. That's all I'm going to say about the Hose's raging debate on interracial relationships. With progeny that look like this, it's clear that evolution wants people to be half-Asian. Or half-black. Or half-white. You get the idea.

Manolo's Ex-Crush of the Week

First of all, thank you Sparks for shining a bright light on another glaring omission by the US media on a subject that affects us all. It is dedicated citizens like you that keep this republic alive.

In fact, I was all ready to jump on the "Free Amanda Knox" bandwagon but before I did so, I decided to do a little bit more research than the one presented by that liberal ragtag known as the NY Times. Anyway, I decided that Amanda is innocent and the victim of gross prosecutorial miscondunct but I believe we are all better off with her locked up...are any of us really prepared to tackle her herpes outbreaks?

Don't get me wrong...in spite of the deep dose of Valtrex needed, I wouldn't kick Amanda out of the altar if all of a sudden I found myself in a drug-fueled Tuscan Satanic blood orgy. The thing is that in the course of my investigation, I seem to have developed a crush on the Kercher sisters...they are the product of an interracial marriage and it is my theory that interracial kids probably make the cutest kids since they seem to pick up the best traits of their parents (the Cha is a good example)....in fact, I think society would be better off if everyone was mixed but I digress....

Picture below of the Kercher sisters (the one on the top left is the dead girl, Meredith Kercher). The other two are of her sister Stephanie Kercher attending the trial...

Who is in charge of buckets at the Hose? Do we need to create a new bucket for accused murderers, the victims, and their families?

Crush of the Week: Accused Orgy Murderer Amanda Knox

Timothy Egan’s blog on the NYTimes ran an important piece today on accused murderer and adorable American Amanda Knox, who is on trial in Italy for killing her British study-abroad roommate. The whole thing is a total European media sensation. The prosecutor in the case (who by all accounts seems crazy) is claiming that Amanda, her boyfriend, and some drifter killed the roommate as part of a good ol’ fashion drug-fueled Tuscan Satanic blood orgy.

This brings up an interesting question: Why is the US lagging so far behind our European brothers in daily coverage of this hot chick? Shouldn’t her beautiful face be splashed across the NYPost every day, as it is on the Guardian? What’s wrong with our tabloids that this isn’t worth over-covering?

C’mon People! This might be the most attractive woman ever accused of murder, AND it was supposedly committed during four-way sex, AND it seems highly likely that the accusations are totally false, meaning a stunning American college student is rotting in an Italian prison for something she didn’t do. We should be paying way too much attention. A smoking hot 21 year old falsely accused orgy murderer is more worthy of our print space than those homely, terrible John & Kate people.

Anyway, it's a good thing no one like her ever asked me to take part in a murderous blood orgy back when I was in college. I could have gotten in a lot of trouble.

Three cheers for big ears

More for the POTUS/FLOTUS hotness debate: Barack Obama is our hottest president and, dare I say, hot for a non-president. This article in Slate talks about how a woman should focus not on looks or wealth, because Obama, for example had neither of those as a young student or community organizer. I disagree! He was good looking then! Am I crazy or have people's sense of attractiveness become completely wonky?

Crush of the Week: Jillian (Jill) Harris

I (heart) Canadians! They are so sweet and the urban areas tend to cleaner, great strip clubs, you name.

Canada's latest gift to us is Jillian Harris. The second runner up to this year's Bachelor is 29, terribly sweet and as a fan favorite. As a fan favorite, she had the good fortune to not be picked by d-bag at large, Jason Mesnick.

Her reward is a two month run on ABC all about her!

While we're here, what about Jason Mesnick? Pick Melissa, go away with her for 6 weeks and then dump her on the "After the Rose" TV Special in front of everyone? Then double back for Molly? D*ck much?



Meghan McCain was a close second but we beat that topic to death earlier in the week

Crush of the Week: Gail Simmons

Last night was the season finale of Top Chef. Much to my delight, occasional judge/food sexpot Gail Simmons showed up. I love me some Gail Simmons. Here are a few reasons.

• She's not super thin, which is important if you are supposed to be a food expert. How can I judge your expertise if you don't look like you can eat? I'm looking at you Giada. Clearly this woman can eat.
• She has that sort of crackly, smokey voice. I'm into that. I'm a sucker. Voice is surprisingly important. I mean the Padma is gorgeous we all know this. That said, if I had to listen to her speaking cadence every day I might chop my ears off.
• The last thing, I am too much of a gentleman to mention, but let's just assume I picked this photo because it calls attention to one of her better physical assets.