Manolo Is Afraid Of...

Given the sheltered life many of us lead, one doesn’t really know how one will react under pressure. I even like to think I am a bit of a risk taker (except for that girl back in college who I didn’t tell her I liked her until it was too late). Nevertheless, I have always prided myself in not being afraid. I like to think that when the time comes, I will rise to the occasion.

Last night, I went to visit my parents and grab that once a week (sometimes twice) home-cooked meal. Anyway, after a long night of talking and the eating and actually enjoying time with the family (shout out to Xtian and his typical family time), I decided to crash at my parent’s place instead of driving the 20 minutes home.

Everyone had gone to bed so there was no noise whatsoever except for the whoosh/swoosh of the ceiling fan. Almost undergoing an out of body experience, I saw my body shift to a defensive posture and move towards the other side of the bed. I suddenly came to the painful realization that there is something I am indeed afraid of…I am afraid of ceiling fans!!!

When I was a little kid, I would throw rubber balls or paper planes with Crayola colored US Air Force insignia at the ceiling fans in my house. I guess the damage those little planes suffered has scarred me for life because I am afraid that the ceiling fan is going to give way and fall on top of me, or that the blades will tomahawk my head off, or that the individual blades will give way and impel themselves in my soft tender body.

Anyway, now that I know my fear, I do feel better and I realize I don’t have to be afraid anymore. I just need to make sure the damn suckers are off…

Who's His Agent?!

Evil



Slash is doing commercials for VW now? I don't understand! I don't understand! (Waiting for the Duff McKagen Crate & Barrel commercial. Or maybe the Izzy Stradlin MetLife commercial.)

Let's Go Be Famous

Evil



Let's go pitch our idea! You supply the idea. I will take (most of) the fame and glory.

Life Update

Evil

I didn't leave my apartment all of yesterday, even though the sun was shining and it looked from my window like people were having a good time outside. I think it spend at least 80% of yesterday lying down, whether it was sleeping, the 2 naps, or just on the couch watching TV.

If I Did It

Evil

Over the years, some people have accused me of stealing their jokes, one-liners, and other humorous commentary. Yes, a lot of my jokes are based on "previous art," but I wouldn't consider it stealing per se. I think of it more like a mash-up -- like combining Google Maps with Craigslist, like combining The Beatles with Jay Z -- except with humor. It's really a tribute to the humor of everyone I allegedly steal from. The beauty of the mashup era is that the re-invention gives more legs to the original invention. So all you toolboxes who always accuse me of stealing... I'm actually doing you a favor!

Manolo Wishes You A Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Right where we belong?

Am I Famous?

Evil

Check out these screenshots from the Firefox site. Recognize one of those email addresses? Am I famous?

Victory!

Evil



This past Sunday, I ran the Philly Marathon... and boy am I tired! OK, no I didn't. This past Sunday, I sat around eating ice cream and trying to remember the good ol' days when I used to be in shape. But two Friend Of The Hose, Evil Twin #1 and Evil Twin #2, DID run the Philly Marathon. Congrats to Evil Twins!

Is This A Problem?

Evil

It seems that I no longer like to drink wine out of a wine glass. Instead, I find it much more fun to drink wine out of a tumbler! Is this a problem?

Has This Ever Happened To You?

Evil

1. Think to self, "Oooh! I'm going to have some of that great cheese I have in the fridge!"

2. Go to fridge. Open fridge door. Look around for cheese and don't find it.

3. Finally remember that you ate the ENTIRE BLOCK of cheese last night while either drunk or very, very sleepy.

Manolo Takes The Midnight Train To Georgia

I really don't listen to music so I have never been much of a concertgoer. Last night, some friends of mine had an extra ticket to see Gladys Knight at the Hard Rock Casino. To be honest, I only said yes because it was killing two birds with one stone. First of all, I hadn't seen them in a long time so it was a nice excuse to see them and I had nothing else to do. In fact, until I got to the concert and met up with my friends, I really had no idea who she was until they mentioned a couple of her songs.

I have to tell you that after last night, I am a huge fan. The concert was super short (only an hour long) but what it lacked in length was eclipsed by quality itself. From the front row seats themselves to her voice, the song selection and audience interaction, it was a magnificent show. That woman is a true diva...you should take some lessons, Evil!

I downloaded her whole music catalog so next time I go karaoking in NYC with my peeps (peeps/pips - did anyone catch it?) everyone should move aside for my award winning rendition of Midnight Train To Georgia. I don't think another perfect score of a 100 is far from the realm of possibility.

Sometimes we should all feel like this guy!

Sometimes I Feel Like This Guy

Evil



Today, especially. (But at least I'm not alone, according to this article.)