If there's one thing that really puts a chubby in the pants of the International Elitist Intelligentsia, it's giving America the big "F YOU!" Witness what the International Olympic Committee (IOC) did to Barack Obama and the US recently. But alas! Perhaps the only thing stronger than their hatred of America is their White Man's Guilt. This week, the old European whities tried to right their wrong by tossing the Nobel Peace Prize Barack Obama's way. Nevermind that he didn't do anything to deserve it, but their guilt was just too overwhelming.
Well, you know what, whities? That's not enough!!! If you really want Barack and America to forgive you, you have to take it to the next level!!! We demand that Barack Obama gets all the Nobel Prizes. We have plenty of justification:
Nobel Peace Prize - Done!
Nobel Prize for Literature - No brainer! Barack has written two best-selling books and plenty of awesome speeches.
Nobel Prize for Medicine - He's going to reform our healthcare system!
Nobel Prize for Economics - He's going to pull us (no, the world!) out of this recession. Paul Krugman can suck it.
Nobel Prize for Chemistry - Joint award to Barack and Michelle Obama. They have awesome chemistry.
Nobel Prize for Physics - Another no brainer... the man can walk on water! Now if we can just productize this scientific breakthrough, we'll finally be energy independent.
Cmon, old European whities, make it happen!
Posts
|