The Hose

Outdated Movie Review

I caught Jon Favreau's new movie, ELF today. Well, its not really that new at all...now is it. I got to admit, for a kiddie movie/hollywood fluff there was a lot there to stare at. The north pole scenes made me think of those old ass stop motion animation Christmas specials that they used to show on CBS when i was a kid and that took me back into all these childhood memories about Christmas. Like the time I bitched to my parents that they didn't even try that Santa Claus gag with me, and the next morning (like december 3rd) there was a gift from Santa under the tree. Or that time my mom took me to Toys-r-Us and asked me which toys I would like for christmas, promptly bought them all, wrapped them, threw them under the tree and handed them out to all my cousins on Christmas, while she handed me some socks or underwear...(f*** YOU, dude! I want Zartan!)

Where was I? Oh yeah, the movie! So what I liked. I liked Zoey Deschanel! She rocks. She is really attractive in a japanese anime kind of way. I like her being cynical and with a slouched back, in my wierd fantasies that's usually how she is. I liked the cameo by Amy Sedaris (sister of David) and the shout out to David Sedaris' book Santa Land Diaries , " Did Crumpet send you?". Nice, subtle. Well played. But what was not subtle and what saved the movie is Will Ferrell. I have decided that will be in my movie when i make it and he's going to play my brother. Damn that dude is great. Hah!