xTian and Evil Pose as Hipsters

“There are an a**load of motherf*ckers in there right now”.

The bouncer outside Jumbo’s Clown Room was exactly the sort of person we had been encountering all weekend, someone very intentionally semi-disheveled and projecting an air of confidence about it that I could never match.
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I wondered aloud if people should hide their mothers, given the sheer numbers of motherf*ckers in the vicinity. Only Evil laughed. When I asked if any of the goth burlesque dancers inside would make me a balloon animal, I was met with blank stares.

I would categorize this as an auspicious end to an entertaining if non traditional engagement/wedding weekend.

Evil and I had met up the day prior in LA. We were in town because the AY (formerly the MPCGEB) was getting married (sometime soon) and she wanted to hold a pre-reception for all her friends. In truth, it’s not obvious to me why I was invited, but I was so I came. I had met her boyfriend maybe twice and both times walked away worried that he was moments from kissing me. Outside of them, the only person I knew there was Evil.

For his part, Evil is properly great friends with the AY and absolutely should be there. So he traveled farther than I, getting on a plane yesterday (though there it was already today) just to make the event. When we met I noticed he was sipping Ginger Ale, Evil admitted that he overdosed on Ambien on the plane and proceeded to vomit in the aisle before he passed out about 1 hour into the flight. I found this hilarious. He did not even seem remotely embarrassed.

He was even less embarrassed when he put on his pork pie hat and suggested we walk two blocks and get in line for Jimmy Kimmel Live. Ostensibly, our agenda was to be invited to Jimmy’s house for Sunday football with the Killers, Tom Cruise’s mom, Adam Corolla and the Sports Guy Bill Simmons. What Evil neglected to mention to me was that he really wanted to see the Twilight kids. That was a major disappointment, no Twilight kids (they were pretaped) and no invite to Sunday football. Evil and I were disappointed. Evil was so disappointed that he ordered a pizza at 3am and ripped it apart.

The weekend itself was more hipster than I expected. There was a visit to the Magic Castle, the rental of the most awesome Korean BBQ Taco Truck, a 5 card no limit texas hold ‘em tournament and me singing a very disturbing rendition of Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Heart Club Band.

Saturday night, we did Dining in the Dark and ate in complete darkness - pretty wild. Coming back from our evening out, Evil and I introduced a brother on the trip with us to In-N-Out and we tore it up animal style at 2am.

It was good to see Evil again…