Holiday Stress

I am very stressed right now. Is anyone else?
The gifts to buy. Chocolate everywhere.

There was just a holiday party in my office. My Secret Santa gift ($15 - $25) was a magazine subscription to Time Out New York. It was within the range since it was buy one get one free - a win for everyone.

Well, my giftee is from out of town, so I let her pick another magazine of her choice. She picked one that is 3 times as much. I think I should just order it since I am too embarrassed to say "No, sorry. It's not within the range."

Generousity will come back to me, right? I guess if I am expecting good things in the future, it's not really generous.

HAH!

From Today's NY Daily News

"Minaya likened his pursuit of another top-of-the-rotation starter to a bachelor seeking a date at the bar. Keep asking, and ask enough people, and someone might just say yes - though get used to rejection."

Omar is great!

It's All About Me (Birthday Post)

In an effort to distract readers from the lovers quarrel between Evil and Xtian, I am going to post about myself and a birthday on the horizon.

I am fairly confident that I am the oldest member of the Hose, but I am looking forward to this birthday, since it will be an even-numbered year. Not that this past year has been particularly terrible, but the odd-numbered years seem to be a bit rocky.

I might want to plan a party to celebrate. Who wants to come? Everyone can bring a date.

Double Standard

Why can't I discuss Evil's manners but he can discuss my poor decision making?

Prediction (Followup)

Evil

Remember my earlier prediction about XTIAN finding himself in a stable, well-adjusted relationship by Jan 5, 2005? Well well well... do I have an update for you! The full prediction hasn't come true yet, but I hear from a very reliable source (awww yeah, I'm pulling a Robert Novack!) that one of XTIAN's ex-women is now back in the picture. I'm not saying that she'll necessarily be the one come Jan 5, but the wheels are in motion. I'm happy for XTIAN. He's clearly too busy having a real life. That's why I'm the loser who keeps posting.

Darkness!

Anybody remember stuff like this. December is a dark time on the Hose. I'm a little scared....

Accomplishment

Evil

Someone viewed my Friendster profile today!!! Hallelujah. Shout out to The Kindergarten Teacher!

Ambition

Evil

It's 7:15 in the morning and I'm already at JFK terminal 8 for my 9:15 flight. I can't stand being late. I can't stand even the thought of being late. It's pleasantly quiet in JFK -- I didn't know what to expect being that it's Thanksgiving week, but maybe people aren't traveling until tomorrow? I walk past a food stand and want to get a glass of the fresh-squeezed orange juice they have sitting on ice. But the juice goes for something like $4.50, so I pass. Every time I walk past that food stand in terminal 8, I always want to get a juice, but I always pass. One time, I was traveling from San Francisco to New York with my friend The AY and as we were nearing the food stand, she goes, "OH! The orange juice! I LOVE the fresh-squeezed orange juice at this stand. I'm gonna get one." Then she asks, "You want one?" I answer, "Nah."

Right next to the food stand is this shop called Alti-tunes. They rent you music and DVDs that you can take on the plane. I never noticed it until this morning. But then again, I rarely notice anything at JFK -- it's usually so hectic and I'm usually in such a blur as I trudge from curb to gate, from gate to curb. But today, the thing about Alti-tunes that caught my eye was one of their video screens. The audio was on mute, but the image was unmistakable: a young Bob Dylan, in grainy, harshly-lit black and white video. This must have been circa 1965, just a couple of years after Dylan arrived on the scene in Greenwich Village. This morning, I can only bear to watch a second or two of young Dylan before moving on. In general, I can't watch any young Dylan footage anymore because it makes me feel too crappy about myself. Seeing Dylan, aged 22, 23 years, singing with the intensity and ambition that he does has this effect on me that goes beyond humbling; it borders on dispair. In Dylan's book, Chonicles Volume I, he has this great line about knowing his eventual fame from a very young age: (paraphrasing) "The world was shining its spotlight right at me, and nobody else."

I have this nagging feeling that I'm falling behind in life. I read and hear about younger people who are more successful than I am, you know, more money, more fame, great abs, the whole bit. Friends and co-workers my age are all on track to having wonderful little families of their own, if they don't already have one.

I'm on the JFK to SFO flight and catching up on my magazine reading. I bring 8 magazines with me on this trip. (I subscribe to about 20 magazines, so I would've brought more, if it weren't such a schlep.) Time magazine has this cover story, "The Secrets of Ambition: A surprising look at life's go-getters from its also-rans." The article profiles various famous people. For example, of Oprah, the article said: "She could read at 2, and although she was just 5 when she started school, she insisted on being put in first grade. Her teacher relented. The next year, young Oprah was skipped to third grade." I mean, crap, I'm pretty sure I wasn't reading until I was 5 or 6. At the end of third grade, I was offered the chance to skip fourth grade and my dad really wanted me to do it. But I was afraid to leave all my friends, so I basically filibustered (i.e. cried) until I got my way.

The article also profiled Vera Wang: she went to work at Vogue right out of college and put in 7-day work weeks. This helped her land the role of senior editor of the magazine at 23. I remember when I was 23: I was obsessed with bidding on Pokemon plush toys from eBay. (Hey, they were rare ones from Japan! You COULDN'T get them retail in the States!!!)

I didn't read the entire Time magazine article, actually. Maybe I wasn't ambitious enough? I just skimmed the little call-out boxes where they do the famous-people profiles, so I never did find out what's really "surprising" about life's go-getters vs. its also-rans.

I know a girl who's really pretty and nice. And smart! She has this endearing thing about her... he tends to blush very easily. Not that I'm the best at reading these things, but she might even like me. At the very least, she doesn't object to my presence. I want to ask her out. Should I?

This is a much more pleasant picture and post than angry Xtian's (no swearing).

F*cking Drunks!

The Pizza man is my boy. He owns a pizza shop on the corner of 23rd and 8th and he's the orneriest muther-f*cker in the world. That is to say, he's never in a good mood. What's really funny is that his tolerance for gays and drunks is lower than one would expect. I would say 55% of his business is drunken gays, with 80-85% of his business being consumers who can be described by at least one of these adjectives. You already know how he feels about the gays...even I was surprised by his feelings on drunks...

Recently, I went to dinner with Ill-Mannered, KenTak3 and the Mamacita...We went to Max. I'm on a first name basis over there and though the service is terrible its great. After a long dinner, I walked home.

On the walk home, I crossed by the scenes of several past defeats, Union Square, The Coffee Shop, Eugenes...as i cruised by the Gypsy Tea I saw a remarkable site...An SUV screeched to a halt and a young woman (of about 20...and I'm being generous) jumped out. She ran towards a modern NYC phone booth (pictured above), dropper her jeans and proceeded to either pee or drop an incredibly loose stool all over the street. I turned, looked, screetched and ran...several of her friends were pouring out of the car and screaming. Everyone was drunk and one of them stopped screaming long enough to call me a perv...yes, that's right, somehow i was the sick one...

I decided to visit the pizza man. I told him the story and he began waving his hands up in the air going "These f*cking drunk people. they're out of control"

Several, pizza consumers, looked up from their incredibly loud conversations sucked their teeth and left...

Evil or just Ill-Mannered???

A friend of mine (who shall remain nameless) is clearly ill-mannered. Towards the end of last week we all agreed we would congratulate Mr. Shoulder's personal and professional success by visiting his elaborate apartment in Hoboken. Mr. Shoulder's very eager to entertain proposed catering a lunch while we watched football and discussed our lives.

I was eager to see how Mr. Shoulders was making out. Kentak was also receptive...our unnamed friend not only matched our enthusiasm but surpassed it. Sunday approached and I secured a ride for my friend and myself from kentak. However, when I phoned him to ask after his status, the nameless one was quick to answer the phone but slow to provide a meaningful answer as why he was not joining us. I am somewhat used to this behaviour so I let it go. However, in the car, kentak recieves a call from Mr. Shoulders asking after us to make sure we did not get lost between the tunnel and Hoboken. It was clear that he was ordering food for several people and I had to alert him to the change in plans. Mr. Shoulders ever a good host was surprised but dide not communicate disappointment. Instead I hung up and rung Evil.

"[Evil], don't you think its appropriate to phone Mr Shoulders, apologize for not being able to join us and remind him to order less food."

"oh...yeah"

"I told him you weren't coming but you should still phone"

"why, you already told him?"

I decided it was time to give up....

Silly Photos

Evil

Earlier today, Tiger Woods won the Dunlop Pheonix golf tournament in Japan. He defeated Japan's Kaname Yokoo in a 4 hole playoff and then was pictured kissing the phallic trophy.



Why do people kiss trophies? I never understood that. (The fact that I've never won a trophy for anything at all is besides the point!) Women should take extra care, I think, especially pro golfer Christie Kerr.

Waiting for Mamacita

Evil

Mamacita has a post in DRAFT mode! She's coming soooooon!!!!!!

Roasted Sea Scallops and Rock Shrimp

Evil

I dropped by Citerella's after work today to pick up some ingredients for a batch of pasta sauce that I'll make tomorrow. It also happens that the the sea scallops looked great today, so I picked up some of that as well. Here's an improvised recipe that actually turned out quite decent!

ROASTED SEA SCALLOPS AND ROCK SHRIMP


* 1/2 pound (large) sea scallops
* 1/2 pound rock shrimp
* 3 plum tomatoes (canned), crushed
* 1 small onion, minced
* 1 clove garlic, minced
* 2 tbs fresh flat leaf parsley, minced
* 1 tbs olive oil
* 1 tsp paprika
* 1 splash of dry riesling -- you know, if you were drinking the previous night
* Salt and pepper to taste


Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Mix all ingredients, except for scallops and rock shrimp, in a small baking dish. Bake in oven for about 10 minutes, until the liquid is bubbling.

Then add mix in the scallops. Bake for another 5 minutes.

Then add mix in the rock shrimp. Bake for another 5 minutes.

Remove from oven and allow to cool for a few minutes. Serve with warmed baguette and the same reisling that you didn't finish from the previous night. It's not too shabby!

(p.s. - I'm usually not at all picky with ingredients or proportions, but in this case, I'd highly recommend going for the rock shrimp, as opposed to regular shrimp. The rock shimp is much sweeter than regular shrimp. It also smaller and has a more interesting texture... goes quite well with the scallops.)

R.I.P.

Evil



R.I.P., Chavo Guerrero

WWJD?

Evil

This happens to me at least 4 times a week: I'm inside the elevator and just as the doors are closing, someone lunges forth and tries to get in at the last second. My reaction? Well, so as not to SEEM like an asshole, I make this motion toward the buttons on the panel as if I were trying to hit the "open" button. But I really don't and the doors close. And when they do, I relish at having saved myself 3 seconds and depriving that other person of the same 3 seconds. I mean, who can't wait 3 seconds for the next elevator to come? SHEESH!

PW3801 - Advanced People Watching (cont'd)

Evil

After three straight days of not working out and stressing big-time at work, I decide to bring my pudgy butt to Equinox today. Boy am I glad I did, because there was great people watching to be had!

I was in the stretching area, you know... stretching. And next to me is this hot female trainer, training this tooly-looking white dude. The female trainer has her back to me; the tooly white dude is facing me. The trainer's trying to get the dude to do some bend-and-stretch exercise, which essentially involves bending and stretching in the gayest ways possible (if you're a dude. If you're a chick, it's actually quite hot!). She demonstrates: there is lots of bending over, lots of sticking out her ass, lots of arching her back, and lots more of sticking out her ass.

"Now you do it," she says.

The dude protests, not verbally, but I can tell because his face is totally flush and he has this "WFT?!" goofy grin on his face. I look right at him. It is clear I'm not really stretching in the stretching area.

The trainer says, "Go on, do it."

The dude shrugs his shoulders. I look right at him. He glances at me. He decides he has no choice, so he does the gay bending-and-stretching exercise! I am staring at him the whole time for the sole purpose that it's making him all the more uncomfortable. Is that an asshole move on my part? Yah! Hahaha. But it amused me, nonetheless.

Screening Party?

Evil



Interested in the new Bret Hart DVD? You're all invited to a screening party at my place. In addition to the documentary part of the DVD, there are also some great bonus matches, including:

-- Hart Foundation vs. British Bulldogs (Madison Square Garden, July 1985)
-- Bret Hart vs. Ricky Steamboat (Boston Garden, March 1986)
-- Bret Hart vs. Chris Benoit (WCW Nitro, October 1999)

We couldn't have a classy screening party without something to eat and drink, so I was thinking, something like: roasted portobello, roasted figs wrapped in bacon, braised sea scallops, and home-baked biscuits. To drink: well, basically anything from my stash of wines because after all, I AM an alcoholic. And for dessert: baked gooey chocolate pudding, my favorite Nigella recipe of all time.

Welcome!

Evil

Bruno's Mom, welcome to The Hose!!!

Aquaman

The WB has announced that on the heels of a huge ratings bonanza, they are going to spin off the A.C. (Slater?) character from onto his own show...called Aqua...similar to Smallville it will follow the lead's progression from young man to superhero or in this case...aquaman...who has the power to talk to fish and...um...suck...

You may recall that HBO used Aquaman as a spoof for the proliferation of super hero movies in hollywood on the brilliant Entourage. For those of you who aren't familiar with Aquaman. You can read about him and the very gay Superfriends cartoon from the 70s here.