The Hose

Please move Boston over there, next to the Yankees...In that column there...Yes...PERFECT!

Over the past couple of year, instead of rooting for porous defense and sub-par pitching of my team, I have come to support baseball's GOOD STORIES. And nothing was a better story than the Red Sox! Here were a bunch of maniacs who seemed to revel in misery and only found peace when shooting themselves in the foot (hey! That sounds familiar...). They were a bunch of babied millionaires sure, but they did not seem to own a set of hair clippers between them. The Yankees of course, had the history and the twenty six titles and Derek Jeter is the consummate professional and blah blah! The Red Sox had Manny, who sauntered, Manny who could throw a guy out from deep left field with the same frequency he let a grounder get by him out there. Not only that but they lost, and not only did they loose, the lost SPECTACULARLY. They lost and you felt for them (assuming you were like me and you hated the Yankees). I couldn't give a crap about these guys unless they're playing the Yankees. Because when they lost it was dramatic and you felt it. Aaron Boone felt like a punch in the stomach. This is a metaphoric punch to the stomach, the punch to the stomach that Darren, Jeff and I saw a drug dealer lay on his girlfriend at the bar we in Oakland we watched the game at.

Yesterday was it for me because then they won! The hell!? I did not watch more than three pitches of the World Series (Pedro's pitches, of course) Who needs that, what about the curse? What about the Yankees? I don't show up trying to root for winners, I show up rooting for self defeat and scruffy batting helmets and crazy hair.

The worst part is, The Red Sox won, because unlike in previous years where they got out maneuvered by the Yanks. This year they beat the yanks at their own game. Getting the big name pitcher (Schilling) in the winter and picking up a bunch of guys for the stretch run ( Mankeiskzizkkqiwitz and Cabrera). So what does that make them?

The New Yankees! F*CK THAT! Stop this train I'm getting off.

I hate their f*cking fans anyway!