Grilled Meat

On Sunday, I went over to KenTak's house to hang out with him, the GF and their gay dog Bruno. I brought along MikeT just because he did not seem to be doing much and also I figured bruno would crush hard on Mike's shaved head and plaid shirt. Totally nailed that one too...

KenTak apparently has not upgraded his OS for the summer, because his grilling skills were severely lacking. The GF of course, delivered across a number of dimensions. Baking cookies, keeping me from stepping on Bruno's doody rag and generally being a good hostess. The real hero of the day was Evil Twin 1 who showed up and dropped so BBQ-Fu that will be the talk of BBQs from NY to Boston for seasons to come. It got really interesting when she started flipping beef while doing the worm. WHAT TALENT!

Evil Twin #2 was also on sight. She and I had the best conversation.

her:"hey, how are you?"

me:"Great you?"

her:"I'm good!"

me:"really?"

her:"yeah why?"

me:"I read your blog"

her:"oh yeah...so you know how I'm really doing"

me: "right..."

her:"i'm ok. Things are getting better"

Our conversation moved on to what we have been up to for the last several months at one point i started something with "And then in Miami..."...She cut me off with a "oh yeah that was a great blog entry. I liked the part where..." I tuned her out...whats the point of talking when we can BLOG!

Not much else happened, I ate, there was a food coma, for some reason MTV came on and we settled into TRUE LIFE : I'M A JERSEY SHORE GIRL

There was one really friggin annoying guy there, who upon hearing that Evil Twin 2 was leaving her job went into this diatribe about the increasing demands by the market that large corporations divest of businesses and focus on core competencies, and somehow tried to analogize it to ET2 quiting a crappy lawyer job for a better one with more money. MikeT not know what to make of that said something sarcastic like "that was the most insightful thinking on business trends I've heard in quite some time, should I put that in my next analyst report?"

I wondered if someone left an economist at this dude's bbq. what a tool?

Musings on Revenge of the Sith...(SPOILER ALERT)

I spent a great deal of time trying to figure out why Yoda quits towards the end of Revenge of the Sith. Why do he and Obi Wan agree that the only strategy is a retreat? Obi Wan has defeated Vader. Surely together Yoda and Obi Wan could stand against the Dark Lord, Siddious. I cam up with an idea that worked for me, you guys let me know what you think. When Shaft almost killed Palpatine, it was obvious to me that he used anger and darkness that he was in fact on the path towards the Dark Side. It’s an eerie foreshadowing to the same scene in Return of the Jedi, where Luke on the verge of defeating the Emperor was on the verge of succumbing to the dark side. Is it true then that any Jedi in order to defeat a true dark lord has to access the dark side, that there must always be a balance between the light and the dark, that there must always be a Dark Lord?

Vader is the fulcrum in both scenes. In RotS, he kills Shaft, thereby cementing his position as one of the two dark lords. In RotJ he kills the Emperor and thereby finally ending the reign of the Sith by keeping his son from succumbing to the dark side. The fact that Vader then dies naturally is the only cause for the end of the dark side, no Jedi had to access the darkness to defeat him. Also when you line these scenes up against each other, you realize that Vader is truly the focal point of the series. Lucas has often pointed out that the 6 films when viewed together are essentially the redemption of Anakin Skywalker. The crucial decision, the one he makes the “wrong choice: in RotS he handles quite differently in RotJ. What’s funny is that I don’t think Vader ever gives up the dark side. Vader, when he throws the Emperor over the scaffolding still working from a fear of loss, loss of his son. As Yoda, accurately points out fear of loss is a path towards the dark side. So I challenge Lucas’ set up of this series as the redemption of Anakin. Yes he “undoes” the damage he does by saving Luke, but he never finds his way to the Light of the Force, he uses the same tools he always used, anger, passion, frustration. I might be revisiting an old inconsistency here.

So viewed from this lens, we understand what’s happening. We understand that Yoda and Obi Wan can’t take the fight to the Emperor directly; doing so will take them to the Dark Side. The New Hope, then is that Vader’s son will somehow be able to influence Vader’s actions so he can fulfill his destiny and restore the light to the force.

Btw, it seems to me that Siddious explains to us the origin of Vader. It seems to me that Siddious’ master is this fellow he mentions to Anakin when he is attempting to seduce him to the Dark Side; the one who can manipulate midiclorians to shape life. Assuming Siddious is the pupil who kills that Dark Lord then we can now clearly account for the origin of Anakin.

Many were confused by the implication that Anakin was conceived immaculately. It’s the one counter point to Jon-El’s reasonably well thought out theory that Lucas fundamentally posits that science is the new religion in the second trilogy by trying to explain away the force as scientific fact like gravity, much unlike the earlier trilogy where it is all masked in mysticism. I actually think it’s a little different. I think he’s saying that the decay of society can most quickly be noticed in the decay of the knowledge that this society wields. The society in the Classic Star Wars Trilogy is most clearly in decay and as a result, a culture has re-emerged where the unknown rather than be properly explored is now simply mystified.

Cross/Up Selling

My first post on Ordinal Rule is up. You can read it by clicking here.

PLUS

We now have an RSS Feed for the Hose, all you information syndicators can now leverage the power of RSS. Click here to find out how to leverage this powerful tool.

Miami and other Gayness

At the airport, while waiting for the plane, I really didn’t know how the weekend would end up. I had no idea how much or how little sleep I would get. I had no idea if I had packed appropriately for the weather. I didn’t even know if I was flying down by myself or not. Jon-El was had been vacillating all week on whether or not he would appear, at last check he was not. But really, who was to say with any certainty.

Read more about xTian and Manolo in Miami here.

Manolo Gets Motivated

Did anybody watch the Simpsons or Family Guy this weekend? I must have stopped the shows 4-5 times because I was laughing so hard...

In the last episode of the Simpsons, Bart gets kicked out of Springfield elementary and they are having a family discussion around the dinner table and how they are going to have to send him to private school.

Then Homer goes:

“And if you get kicked out of that one, you are going straight into the army where you will be sent straight to America’s latest quagmire. Where will it be? North Korea? Iran? Anything is possible with Commander Cuckoo Bananas in charge.”

HAHAHAHA!!!!

Then, in Family Guy, the neighbors were having a discussion outside when all of a sudden; a giant chicken appears out of nowhere. The giant chicken and Peter Griffin then spend the next 10 minutes fighting all over town…he finally defeats the giant chicken, and appears all beaten up to renew the discussion he was having with his neighbors like nothing happened.

Hah! They are freaking geniuses…Where do they come up with that stuff?

I remember that there was one time where Xtian and Evil were trying to take the Hose of its doldrums existence and started targeting MTV and VH1 executives via personalized ads in Google. I don’t think it went anywhere as it seems the executives were not vain enough to “Google” themselves…what's wrong with them? How can we be part of “Best Week Ever” or “When _______ ruled the World” if we are still relying on metrics from the old hey-days of the dot com era? Eyeballs? Unique visitors? Wtf?

Anyways, the point of the story it’s that the Hose lacks such geniuses and everything at the Hose seems falls on my shoulders…I just hope that my discussions with Xtian this weekend and this post are a rallying cry for somebody to think outside the box...

Coming up next month: Top 10 Hose Posts (as voted by our readers)

A distinguished panel consisting mainly of ME will decide on 20-25 posts. Our readers will vote on them at a latter date via electronic voting (e-mail). These votes will then be discarded to the trash bin. I, in conjuction with my politically appointed cronnies will finally decide on the top 10 posts...

Dave Chappelle explains himself!

Hurry back!

We need you...

read the article here.

The Hose Makes a Friend or two

Evil Twins is a blog at least partially maintained by someone who has been referenced a few times on this blog, to the point where she earned a nickname, however ill-fitting...

Also, I'm a soon-to-be contributor to Ordinal Rule, a blog created by my friend and brother Weise-Son (better name to follow). Similar in mandate to the Hose, but with one caveat. It's list based.

Someone should point out to the future Mrs. Evil that she should update her friendster profile to say "In a Relationship" so Evil can stop hatching plots that he will never follow thru on.

Also, I finally finished this post from last month...

Manolo Prepares For The Invasion

Actually, Manolo WAS preparing for this weekend's invasion when Jon-El goes ahead and pulls one of his patented moves and decides to cancel on us at the last minute...

It seems that after seeing his name online in the previous post, or perhaps suffering from a slight bout of TBS (touchy bitch syndrome), Jon-El got scared...

What followed was a series of actions, one more drastic than the other, and mainly involving me whining like a girl via voicemails/emails to him, his wife and even his mother to convice Jon-El to come down to the Dirty South after all...It seems that he is afraid that this week is going to be too wild for his taste...

I have decided to post a reply email I sent to Evil back in July 2002 after a similar weekend visit by xTian aka Big Head aka Purple Mushroom and his brother aka Little Big Head aka the Bumpasaurus aka Pacey J. Witter aka Mo Vaughn...

As you can see, there was nothing wild about it...I just hope this alleviates his fears, and those of his significant others and that he will be able to join us after all.

My Mom hates me

My mother hates me.

She hated me a few weeks ago when I missed her birthday. I felt so down about it that I made up this story about surfing and getting a concussion and told everyone I knew just to convince myself it was the truth.

She hated me this past weekend when I failed to come thru again on Mother's Day. It was friday and I had no idea what to do, no one was able to deliver flowers to my mother...the hell?

Not knowing what else to do, I outsourced the responsiblity to a local resource, my brother, The Bumpasaurus - Pacey J. Witter. A recipe for disaster.

Sunday, I ring him eagerly at 10am

"what did my mother and grandmother think of the flowers?"

"I did not get them yet. the futbol is on"

"Can you take care of it now please?"

"Can you cut me a break? Give me an hour."

Not knowing what to do with myself I rung a few aunts. My youngest Aunt was my second call. Her husband picked up and passed the phone to her, yelling

"Miy! [xtian] is on the phone"

"hey, sweetie I'm talking to your mom on my cell phone. Hold on she's saying somehting to me"

"what?"

"she said "{explative], why don't you remind him he has a mother and that should be his first call..." and then she hung up"

"Oh"

Sometimes you just can't win :-(

xTian uses the Force

........TO BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF A PINATA


Check all the faces of shock and awe!

(Either that or these guys are coming down off a heroin buzz...you decide)



Next xTian and Jon-El invade Manolo's Gay bachelor Pad
A wild weekend of singing 60s R&B hits, doing each other's hair and watching Jerry Maguire awaits...plus coke and hookers!!!

Manolo Reads The Paper

I was online and came across the following article...

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/05/03/health/03ugly.html?8hpib

Somehow, Big Head and Big Little Head and their growing up stories popped into my head...